When I die I am taking my stuff with me.

I take advantage of every opportunity to talk to the girls about every subject I can think of,drugs,drinking, sex, education, relationships, death, etc. These opportunities take place in the kitchen when I am cooking; I truly have there undivided attentions when it come to food. The second best place is trapped in a car with me going on some road trip; these trips are hardly under an hour and often days. I invite and encourage questions and feed back.  Literally I preach and they listen then it turns into big laughing session as the English or lack of starts up and the off the wall things that come out of kids mouths. Today was one of those trips where we have our long talks, our subject was death...  It starts out harmless as we pass a cemetery, Mom this place looks creepy. Ya its full of dead people whats your point? Do they burn people here? Yes we call it cremation. The question keep on coming about whats in the house in the cemetery.  I said "it's a mausoleum and people who do not have plots of ground get put in boxes in there. Wow I want to see it Ma, You just said "it looked creepy" now you want to go in the house of the dead. Now the subject has turned into laughter and it deteriorates from there. We covered all the ways to be put to rest and then that lead into what did I want to do, go in the ground or burn.  I said" I don't care I will be dead.  Now price has come into the conversation and poor people. Now I am not sure any more how this is handled so I fudge it a little and again I am asked what did I want done when I pass.  Again I say don't care I will be dead.  I guess you can just burn me and plant me out back with Idgy my dog.  No ma we will put you on water.  I believe they call this pollution and its against the law.  I mean we drink the water, and its bad enough that the fish pee in it.  That sparked around of teenagers disgust: there's nothing like grossing out the kids to make me laugh. I made a comment to the fact that they could do what they wanted when I am gone I won't care.  Burning is cheaper. Then out of no where came the comment Ya Ma I want to be burned to and I want to take all my stuff with me, I'm not leaving any of my stuff when I die. What the hell you want us to leave you in the house with all your stuff burn it down.  Now I can not stop laughing then that gets everyone mad and the selfish one then starts screaming for me to stop. Then one of them says "when you go Ma we are going to sell the dogs". I then said I want to meet the person you sell Archie and Cabot to.  I am real sure you will have to pay them to take Archie and Cabot.  Okay we'll sell Gertie,  I yelled "I can't believe you would sell Gertie, that shocks me that you would sell my dogs that I love. You all better pray I don't go first because I am leaving everything to Gertie now.  No, Ma we are just kidding.