Kung Fu fighting or save the food

I often drink and eat while playing on the computer and the dogs have learned very quickly that all they have to do is get on my chair and they had complete access to what ever I have on the desk. I almost never have more than 15 minutes of uninterrupted time. Between dogs and kids I am hopping in and out of this chair a gazillion times. I have already been up and down 4 times and I have not finished my paragraph. That been said I have lost a lot of food and drink to the Damn Dogs and sometimes a kid or two. I try very hard to remember to move it up high so they can not get it but when I have to move fast or something takes my attention quick I don't think about what I have left behind:I am reminded as soon as I get back that I left my food and its gone. As to complete this picture for clarification my desk is on one side of the room and my bed is on the other side with about 16 feet plus of open space between the two. My desk is next to the entrance of my room and one step down from the hallway. My room is sunken one step lower than the rest of the basement. Making jumping up a little on the hazardous side.   
Last night hooligan boys are ruff housing through the basement at a deafening volume and Archie is upstairs in garbage and kids are deep in the drama of their Korean soaps.  All I need to hear is the cabinet door slam shut and I am up and out of my seat. As my body is in the up ward motion to run the steps I see out the corner of my eye, one of the hooligans is just about to jump in the chair where I have pork loin dinner half eaten sitting there for the taking. I truly believe that my quick turn around left me in mid air and no feet on the ground as I Kung Fued the chair sending it speeding across the floor in pursuit of the hooligan boys who are running at break neck speeds to get to the bed before the chair got them. I did not think about what I was doing or what might happen I just was in the save my dinner mode. The sight of these two boys running like hell with the chair in hot pursuit sent me into such a fit of laughter that I fell on my butt. This happened so quick that I was unable to recover from my Kung Fu tactics and just hit the floor and sat there laughing. I spent much of the evening rerunning that picture in my head and sitting in the basement alone laughing at myself and rubbing my bum.