2011/12/15

To my girls I love you. Mom

As Christmas approaches I find myself reflecting back on my life and how I have conducted myself. I realize I have not always been able to express myself in a manner that has always been positive. I was brought up with a huge sense of fairness and the power that giving is so much stronger than receiving.  Honesty, love and respect for all of God creatures. For this I thank my Mother and Father.  Who taught us all girls and boys how we needed to take care of ourselves and the world around us, to not be a burden on society. 
I have tried to live my life as I was brought up.  I had my moments of total self indulgence and took advantage of my single life.  Living life to the fullest and thought if I did not impose on the world around me I was in compliance with my teachings.   Unfortunately this came back to bite me.  Now I am giving back to the society from which I lived and had fun in.    I do not have regrets on any of my past life. What I do have is regrets that I do not let my kids know how much they mean to me and how they have change my life for the better.  I have been so blessed having all these kids who have put up with my anger, frustration and health issues. Humans can do the most unspeakable things to each other, our species have committed such atrocities that it is often hard to believe such evil exist.   The thing is we are very resilient and learned how to survive. To this fact I have witnessed how the sprite can come through all of the atrocities of a life we cannot even begin to know about. I want to honor my kids and thank them for understanding all of my short comings. I wish I could promise that I will not do the same things again; I do not profess to be able to keep promises like this.  I want my kids to know that they mean the world to me and because I am not as warm and fussy as most, it hasn’t kept me from loving them to death. They are the best kids one could ever want.  My craziness comes from waiting so long in life to take on this endeavored, and the patients one needs and I do not possess.   I absolutely, am so happy that my higher power saw fit to bring us all together kids, dogs and the craziness that come with it. I truly have a wonderful life and to my kids I Love you all more than life itself: To the Damn dogs’ ditto, you have not done me in yet…..

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