I hate sarcastic snotty machines.

The older I get the less I think I can learn. Well maybe the less I want to learn. Either way some things I learn just blind side me and send me to the floor. Today being one of the learning things that just hit me like a brick upside my head.
We are getting ready to do an online auction for the rescue, I am trying to find new avenues to post in to get the word out. I message friend to ask about posting on a page and we start a little messaging back and forth. My last text to this conversation was " No worries I don't tread on others".  I was on my kindle and to lazy to get ups and go to the computer where I know my way around and can Google the spelling of words and stay on my message, so I ask my none English as a first language daughter. How do you spell tread? After several tries she pull out the cell phone and connects to some app she has on it and shove the damn thing in my face and says " say the word Mom". OK, so I say "tread" and the thing just produces a wavy line across it.  She says "say it again Mom". Again I say "tread". Wavy line. Now I am laughing at this and ask "what the hell can't this thing understand English". She shoves it back in my face and I had to move back so she did not shove it in my mouth and says "try again". Results, it spells out Dead. I started laughing so hard I started to cry. She clearly was frustrated at it and me and says let me turn the volume up and try, she (phone) talks to you. She then sticks it in her own face and yells with a really good outside voice and broken English with a twist of who the hell knows what and it said "Dead".  Now I am on the floor and I can not stop laughing and I told her the damn thing is not deaf it can't understand you either. So she shoves it back at me and said "do it again". In my clearest voice I could muster under the bouts of hysteria I said
 "you suck".
The Damn thing said in its clearest female voice "Well I never".  I can't even tell the story with out laughing hysterically I can't even explain why I never finish my chat with my friend. I guess I'll just post this blog and explain when I calm down....